i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize