you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize