please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize