i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
no you cant smoke seaweed
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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