His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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