I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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