I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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