Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
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I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
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Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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