If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize