then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
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The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
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Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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