It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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