On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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