new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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