cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize