We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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