Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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