She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
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