Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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