i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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