There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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