So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
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Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
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You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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