thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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