I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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