Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize