I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
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you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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