Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize