Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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