Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
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