The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
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I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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