You just made me feel so damn special
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
birth control should be required to get into college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize