i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
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I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
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The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
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