I heard we made out
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize