is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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