I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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