yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
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I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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