Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize