Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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