Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
50% drunk capacity currently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize