i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize