I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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