you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize