I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
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