READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
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