it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
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Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
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Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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