Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
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