How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
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I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
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I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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