i think my mom watched the whole time
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
that may or may not have been my penis.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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