We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize