So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize