I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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